The Washington, DC area is full of amazing moms. There are working moms, stay-at-home moms, single moms, moms of multiples, foster moms, adoptive moms, etc. We want to highlight some of those moms like Adrian McClanahan! Each month we will feature one special mom as the Mom of the Month. Know a fellow amazing local mom here?Nominate them here!
Meet our April Mom of the Month Adrian McClanahan! Photo credit: Danielle Flowers Photo
Meet our April Mom of the Month: Adrian McClanahan
Adrian is an IT professional with over 15 years in the technology field, currently working in cybersecurity. She also runs her own business, ChicDivaGeek, LLC, designing websites and helping small businesses implement technology solutions. Adrian lives in Prince George’s County, Maryland, and has been married for 6 years to her husband Maurice. She is a mom of 1, Darrell (18) who’s a senior in high school.
Adrian has a deep passion for seeing other people of color in the tech space, especially women. She also loves seeing black children learning and being introduced to tech. However, as mom, she knows activities for kids can be costly; so she founded the Flash Tech Summit in 2018. This is a free annual tech conference for kids to learn about the different areas and careers in tech. She’s also passionate about giving back and serving her community, it’s something her family does together.
When she’s not working, she enjoys working out, watching any of the Jurassic Park movies (for the millionth time lol), grabbing some good food with friends, and playing video games when she has time.
Adrian and her son! Photo credit: Danielle Flowers Photo
Here is our Q&A with Adrian McClanahan
1. How has parenting changed for you as your son has gotten older? (e.g., how have you prepared him for adulthood/high school?)
As my son has gotten older the way he needs me has changed. People assume that you are hands-off because your child is older, but they still need you. They are navigating a lot of change as they get older, emotions, and social things. And their social experience looks entirely different than ours did. So we talk a lot more. It’s definitely a conversation versus lectures because I want to know how he’s feeling and what’s going on with him.
I am teaching him the importance of keeping notes and receipts via email when communicating with teachers so he has a paper trail when advocating for himself.
I’ve been having him more involved in “responsible things” like going into the bank and talking to the tellers when he needs to do something. We also have conversations about a budget. I’m not an expert but I share little things my parents would’ve told me as I went into the world.
2. What tactics have you used to keep the communication lines open for dealing with an adolescent?
A major key to keeping communication open is suppressing my knee-jerk parenting reactions when my son tells me something. I don’t want him to be afraid to come to me with things. Growing up I wouldn’t go to my parents if I thought or knew it would trigger yelling or an immediate lecture or was going to be met with disapproval. I make the effort to listen. We talk about it and if he’s wrong, we have that part of the conversation too.
3) What lessons have you learned as the years have passed in motherhood?
These last few years, the high school years, whew, they’ve taught us a lot about who he’s growing into. We watch our children become more and more of who they are as their personality develops. In my opinion, in high school is where things are really tested. There’s so much coming at them daily.
I’ve always affirmed him and the things he enjoys. He knows he doesn’t need to go along with the flow to get along. I’m very intentional about our mother/son time because these years fly by with activities, work, and life. I don’t want to look back and be thinking I should’ve and would’ve done this or that. I want him to have memories, knowing that mom intentionally made time to do things that WE enjoyed together.
That’s a big key, to find things they enjoy and connect together through that. My son is into Marvel (so am I) so we do movie outings together. He’s also in the phase of trying new foods, so we’ll go out and eat with just the two of us. He also sends me recipes that he wants to try out at home.
I started intentionally focusing on mother/son time by just picking a day and asking him to hang out and what would he like to do. Because of the relationship we have, he’s very comfortable reminding me if we haven’t had mother/son time.
I can’t say that there’s balance because that’s an illusion, nothing is perfectly balanced ever because life can pull us in lots of directions, but prioritizing that time is key. Make the time because they’re not going to be at home with you forever. In being intentional with that time, we are teaching our children how to show up in other relationships in their own lives.
Adrian and her family Photo credit: Danielle Flowers Photo
