As parents, it’s our duty to teach, guide, and nurture. The beauty of parenting is that our children are teachers, too. Whether you’re learning lessons on patience or how to better go with the flow, here are five life lessons from my toddler that continue to shape me. Let us look to lesson one.
1. It’s Okay to Color Outside the Lines
As soon as my son could form his little fingers around a crayon, he was scribbling on paper and the walls of my home, too. At Daycare, his provider recently printed pictures of flowers for the little ones to color. My son presented his artwork to me, and the words “World Best Mom” were scribbled underneath his crayon-blended image. We all know that feeling of applauding our children’s artwork. As he presented me with my mother’s day piece, I had a lovely reminder that coloring in the lines isn’t the only way something can be beautiful. Sometimes we want our lives to be as close to perfection as possible. We want things clean cut and not messy, but there is so much beauty in coloring outside the lines. I was encouraged to embrace the beauty in the messiness. Let’s explore lesson two.
2. We All Just Want Our Pain Acknowledged
All parents, guardians, and loved ones know that infamous moment when your little one hurts themselves and they run to you for a kiss. My son is notorious for telling me when he’s hurt himself, even if it is just a small fall, “Mommy, I’m hurt.” He comes to me, I kiss where it hurts, and he is back to being Spider-Man. He often leaves saying, “It’s all better now.” In those moments, I recognize the human need to have what pains us acknowledged. Is the pain truly gone or fully healed? Not always, but there is something significant to having the presence of someone we trust, acknowledge, or bear witness to what has happened.
I’m certain many of us long to have our pain acknowledged. Thank God for therapists! Sure, there will come a time for tough love or even injuries that mommy’s kisses will not fix, but I’ve come to learn that assuring our children that they have someone to be with them in the pain is not only healthy, it’s necessary, for adults, too.
3. Make Play & Exploration a Priority
I mention a version of this lesson in this article. Micah is a joyous child. Much of parenting includes planning, cleaning, scheduling, and getting things done. Micah reminds me to slow down and play. Play with him, savor the moments of connection, and be present. Our jobs, societal culture, and overall lives create very few moments for play and exploration. As such, we have to create them. Adulting is serious work, but play and fun should not only be prioritized for the kiddos. We deserve it too.
4. Quality over Quantity
Lesson four is about excess. I was a mom who thought I needed every new learning toy, gadgets, and activity sets. However, it’s been a delight to discover just how little my son needs to have fun. As a result of capitalism, the emphasis on having excess is enticing. Having the right toys, technology, and Amazon home hacks. However, I am in awe of how Micah will find anything, make it fun, and explore and learn. The minimalist movement took hold of mainstream society a few years ago with documentaries. I thoroughly enjoyed Christine Platt’s Book “The Afrominimalist Guide to Living with Less.” I have been slow to adopt the principles in my own life. My son, however, is a perfect reminder through his play and connection that less can lead to a more fulfilling life.
5. Trust Your Knowledge
If you’re anything like me, you read a lot of research on the latest trends when it comes to parenting. Everything from ethical parenting techniques to human development. I’m an avid reader (long live literacy!). However, much of parenting is learning as you go, even if it is not your first parenting rodeo. Sometimes, your intuition is telling you something related to your child, and honestly, I believe you have to listen to it.
I’ve been right every time I have, and my child is better for it. In the same way, we often look for answers, and our gut tells us what we need to do, but for one reason or another, we ignore it. Being a parent has taught me to trust my intuition, overall. When in doubt, do the spiritual practices that align with you and get advice, but often, we already know what we need to do. Listen and trust yourself more. I promise, it’s worth it.
I know there are many lessons you’ve learned from your littles! Do share them in the comments.
